Do you remember that Winnie-the-Pooh "pome" that went something like this (and I quote very loosely):
The more it snows (tiddley-pom)
The more it goes (tiddley-pom)
The more it goes (tiddley-pom)
On snowing
And nobody knows (tiddley-pom)
How cold my toes (tiddley-pom)
How cold my toes (tiddley-pom)
Are growing
This could have been written about me! It is so cold at the moment that all those parts of me that feel as if they have been stuck on to unnecessarily poke out (ears, toes, nose and fingers) just seem to freeze up as soon as I leave the warmth of any building.
Don't mention the word Hat to me. I have tried every kind of Hat, starting with a navy-blue Very English Hat that I purchased in Petticoat Lane, London, and which the authorities at Bangkok Airport managed to squash out of shape in an automatic hand-luggage squashing machine. It took years to unsquash. This Hat is no good in the winter as it does not keep any part of my head or ears warm and also attracts too many stares.
I have bought the navy-blue velour Hat, which covers the top parts of my ears and at least stops heat escaping through my head but is too English Schoolgirl.
I have tried the beret which only makes me look rather peculiar and not at all French.
I have tried the woolly cloche Hat, which, in order to keep my ears warm, needs also to be pulled over my eyes and nose.
I have tried the hood of my coat, which causes people to call me a gnome.
Whatever happened to that perfect of winter Hats, the balaclava? The Hat made slightly unpopular by bank robbers and terrorists, the balaclava, which in my early youth belonged to the staple winter uniform of almost every child seems to have virtually disappeared. Clearly, bank robbers and terrorists are able to purchase them, so where are they getting them from?
